Do you ever feel so deliciously happy that you don’t quite know how to contain yourself? When your heart is so at peace and your very soul is calm with contentment? I don’t really know that I have ever felt this way before. But today, well, today I do. It is a feeling so completely strange to me that I don’t really even know what to do with myself. Usually when I have an onslaught of emotion I sleep, but that doesn’t really satisfy this deliciousness. Am I supposed to run and scream with delight? Do I even admit to feeling like this over events so seemingly small? Nothing too monumental has even happened… yet I feel so strongly that in this moment the world in which I exist is just as it should be. (For the time being)
Allow me to explain: Today I finally received my High School diploma in the mail, just in time to show it off at a small graduation party, at which I received the gift I have so long awaited: A GUN!!! Ever since I can remember I have wanted one and now I dooooo! Plus, I’M GRADUATED! If I could see my birth mom right now I would take great delight in saying, “up yours,” with that particular finger pointed in her face. She told me I could NEVER own a gun and that I wouldn’t graduate if I left when I did. Today, however, both predictions were shattered. I am now the proud owner of both a diploma and a .44 special.
But it doesn’t end there. My mom is home. Do you even know how wonderful this feels? After 17 days in Taiwan, miles and miles away, she is home. It is hard to explain how or even why it was so hard to have her gone, just outside of missing her a great deal, which I did, but I had this impending fear the whole time that she wouldn’t come back, or, even worse, she would but would have nothing to do with me. I understand that to most this may seem a childish perspective on someone leaving for a couple weeks, but that fact didn’t make it any let relevant to me. But for now she is home, and the world is that much more in the right.
